“I’m glad you’re not the same Megan. I don’t want you to be the same.  My Megan is a sunrise, always changing, but beautiful the entire time.” – from Calamity by Brandon Sanderson

I stayed up late last night finishing the book Calamity by Brandon Sanderson.  It’s the last book in the YA series about The Reckoners, a group of regular humans that set out to bring down the super human villains known as Epics.  It’s an interesting take on what the world would be like if all of a sudden everyday ordinary people developed super powers.  What would you do?  Would you use your powers for good or evil?  I really enjoyed the series and recommend it if super heroes and villains are your thing.  It’s filled with great characters and some great twists I didn’t see coming.

The quote above really stuck out for me though.  I have been thinking about it a lot over the last week.  Relationships aren’t easy even when you find that special someone.  You have to work at it.  You have to make an effort.  You have to learn to forgive and forget.  You have to learn to love someone even as they grow and change.  I think that’s the hardest one sometimes.  People get so caught up on what the person was like when they met them and they want them to stay that way forever, but none of us ever do.  Our lives change us daily even though we may not notice it.  The mistakes we make, the accomplishments we achieve, the places we travel to, the people that come in and out of our lives, they all leave a mark.  I found my husband 12 years ago.  I fell in love with him because he was handsome and kind, he listened and he made me feel safe for the first time in my life.  He knew all my secrets and yet he still loved me.  I let him see all of me and he didn’t run away.  He was not perfect and he didn’t try to be.  The first few years of our marriage were fun, crazy, and hard, but we have made it through together and intact.  I found (am still finding – it’s an on going process) that living in the past, hanging on to those dreams of what we remember and hoped for, only makes things harder.  I have to love the husband I have now and not the one I met all those years ago.  Sometimes I get so  frustrated or angry with him that I say those horrible words “Why am I married to this man?”, but when it comes right down to it, the husband I have now truly is the man I love.  He has changed in so many ways  over the years and all those changes add up to a better man.  I hope we have many more years of growing, supporting, learning, experiencing, and changing together.